I’ve become increasingly interested in the way we talk about and treat friends as a culture. They are incredibly powerful relationships that we tend to treat very casually.
Many cultures have a more complex framework for relationships and friendship because there is an awareness of the value and meaning they bring to into peoples’ lives.
For example, in Japanese, nakama is someone who is as close or closer than family and often shares a hobby together. In Judaism, chavruta is a companion with whom you study and analyze the Torah. Or the endless circles of Aunties in black and brown communities.
In our culture, we prioritize sexual life partners, and expect to have all of our needs met through a single individual. This is an unrealistic expectation and leads to isolation for many people.
Our limited framework denies many people the opportunity to invite people into their lives in more meaningful ways. It also reinforces the expectation that relationships can can only look a certain way.
This is the idea behind the queering of relationships in LGBTQ+ communities. It is challenging relationship status quo to find and create meaningful, life-long relationships in other ways.
My challenge to you: be bold about telling friends how much you value them and what they add to your life. Show intentionality and vulnerability when seeking new friends and interesting relationships.
What do you love about your friends??